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Bonds Are a 'Safe' Investment: A Big Lie Gets Even BiggerRenowned equity analyst Perez Hilton has apparently discovered the real reason investors sold off shares of Starbucks Corp. (NASDAQ: SBUX) today. No, it has nothing to do with the weak jobs report, as you may have been thinking.
Maybe its because Wall Street traders are worried about how Britney Spears' hospitalization will will effect sales. The former teen princess is nearly always seen with a latte in hand and, unless Starbucks delivers to the hospital, sales in the LA area could plummet!
But there may be a contrarian play on this news: Starbucks locations in the LA area are less likely to be overrun by Spears and her posse, driving away other customers, and efficiency and sales per square foot could soar!
And the company will have to pay lower insurance premiums because the risk of baristas being attacked with umbrellas is significantly lowered by Ms. Spears' hospitalization.
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
1-04-2008 @ 9:23PM
tim said...
This is a waste of blog space
1-04-2008 @ 10:42PM
serf said...
your comment is a waste of blog space. ps, this typped on wii.
1-05-2008 @ 12:11AM
djarch said...
Yes, it's not amusing the least. You guys should take it down.
1-07-2008 @ 4:43PM
Renee said...
Britney's music has nothing to do with her personal problems. Read about her hospitalization in more detail at Britney's Message