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I've always imagined that one of the great joys of belonging to a Socialist group would be not worrying about the well-nigh incomprehensible fluctuations of the stock market. While other people may lose sleep over the screaming highs and soul-crushing lows of the capitalist economies, hard-core socialists just have to worry about plebian things like political purity, the potato harvest, and whether or not the shops currently have razor blades in stock.With that in mind, I feel somewhat sorry for the Provisional Irish Republican Army. While they rejected the Communist tendencies of the "Official" IRA in the 1960's, they still self-identified as a "non-Marxist Democratic Socialist" organization. However, when they signed a ceasefire in 1997, they rebelled against this identity and invested their funds in the property market and, subsequently, in high-high-dividend deposit accounts in the U.S. According to some reports, Wall Street's recent meltdown may have cost the former terrorist group as much as $274 million.
Needless to say, IRA financial advisors are currently "in a state of panic," as they are watching their funding (and potential political power) evaporate. There is no word yet on whether or not Baader-Meinhof, Shining Path, or Black September were invested in the market!
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
10-20-2008 @ 5:19PM
beachpaul said...
The I.R.A. has Irish alzheimers, They forget everything but the grudges. Tread lightly,Bruce.
10-20-2008 @ 6:09PM
Soultrain said...
Bruce, do you really want to mess with the Irish?? I just don't think that's a good idea. The Irish have long memories and they'll certainly not forget you...