Steve Jobs returns to Apple part time

Curiously enough, I just yesterday received an e-mail notification from Apple charging me $116.36 for renewal of my MobileMe account -- and lo and behold, this morning I got an e-mail from Capital One's Anti-Fraud Unit questioning a charge of $122.80 from (you guessed it) Apple.

This is where it gets good:

Capital One advised me that I must contact Apple to resolve the difference; the guy on the Apple Chat Line, though, informed me that the only charge he could see on my account was the aforesaid $122.80 for something called a "Family Pack" Account, which I had never heard of and never ordered. Furthermore (he said) I would have to get Capital One to drop the charge. When I informed him I never ordered the "Family Pack", and asked him why, then, I had also been charged $116.36 for an "Individual" Account, he suddenly changed his tune: He was sorry, he'd been looking at the wrong account -- and cooly mentioned that the $122.80 (the exact price, remember, of the "Family Pack") just MIGHT have been what they call a "pre-authorization" charge -- where your account is debited for goods and/or services you have not received to make sure you have enough bucks to pay when the bill actually comes due.

(As best as I can figure, this was done on June 18 -- giving them 10 days float on Capital One's cuff for doing absolutely nothing -- and Capital One, judging from the alert they sent me, is starting to get wise to this.)

I cause his Manager to become involved. "Industry SOP ... nothing we can do at our end ... not responsible ... " and blah-blah-blah -- the usual BS. I call Capital One, since only they can get rid of this charge, which was initiated by Apple. Surprise! The charge has disappeared! There never WAS such a charge, that any of the very foreign voices I spoke with could tell.

Now, I do not use text messaging abbreviations lightly, but WTF? It's like I'm suddenly an extra in "Office Space", except I never even get a whiff of Jennifer Aniston.

Now, think of this little story whenever it occurs to you to wonder just how the credit card companies, or the banks, or the insurance companies, etc. could possibly lose the mega-trillions they are purported to have lost: What's the float, d'ya s'pose, for ten days on $22.80, times the number of annual MobileMe re-ups, times the number of companies for whom "pre-authorization" charges (of which you are not notified and which appear to be somehow kept "off the books" unless and until Somebody in the Fraud Department gets a bee up his or her butt) have been permitted, times the number of such programs per company?

And that, mis amis, is just one little corner of the miracle world of modern electronic banking ...

Sorry, should read: " ... the float on $122.80, etc. "

My bad.

Apple is about to blow the doors off during the upcoming earnings announcement. I'm looking for $1.50+. You can short or stay short and maybe you'll you'll get some macro event to save your soul but you're looking for divine intervention. And I've called around and no one I know is experiencing any problems with the new IPhone. Either way they'll fix it and it probably won't cost them a dime and will most likely improve margins. And please, can we do something other than harass Steve? How about Tim Cook? What is he doing these days? Is he looking healthy?
The whole let's talk about Jobs has gotten a little tired. Obviously this company is filled with Diet Coke for breakfast and a venti iced Sumatra to help me relax at night mud eating studs and mares. They'll survive. Oh well, a touch of grey kind of suits them anyway. They will survive.

I do not use text messaging abbreviations lightly, but WTF? It's like I'm suddenly an extra in "Office Space",http://www.heelsunion.com except I never even get a whiff of Jennifer Aniston.