Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory's (NASDAQ: RMCF) first fiscal quarter release had an undeniable theme running throughout. No, it wasn't a happy promo about its delicious confections. Instead, it was the very familiar issue of the recession. I guess the company's premium chocolates aren't wholly economically defensive in nature after all.

According to the results, sales declined by over 5%. Same-store franchised revenues dropped well over 6%. Earnings per diluted share were cut by 25% to 12 cents. Things are rough for Rocky Mountain.

Poor Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory (NASDAQ: RMCF). Chocolate is supposed to be sweet, delicious, fun! It's supposed to be a driver of shareholder value. Alas, in the third quarter, chocolate did nothing for shareholders of this company.

So where do I start? Revenues decreased 15%. Comps at franchised locations dipped over 8% (don't you hate it when comps do that?). Net income on a dollar basis dropped 33%. And earnings per share on a diluted basis declined 26% to $0.14. Do you notice a trend here? From the top to the bottom lines, it seems like everything is headed in one depressing direction. Yep, the economy hasn't been kind to the company's gourmet confections. And I don't necessarily see a quick turnaround for Rocky Mountain. Yes, it is still opening stores and is apparently optimistic about the future. Still, I think it's going to be a long journey back to growth. Hey, if Hershey (NYSE: HSY) is having a tough time with its stock price, you can imagine how Rocky Mountain's management is feeling. The earnings release does mention work on a new business model for locations in smaller markets, as well as a focus on return-on-invested-capital in these territories. A laudable goal, certainly, and I like some of the co-branding concepts that were also touched upon. Doesn't necessarily change my bearish thesis, however.

I remember when Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory (NASDAQ: RMCF) was a cool stock. Unfortunately, that was then and this is now. The economy is horrible, and it's getting worse. Rocky Mountain is not the company with which to ride the storm out.

The third-quarter earnings report, issued on Thursday, showed terrible data. Revenues declined well over 16% to $6.3 million. Earnings per diluted share took a big drop of 30%, coming in at $0.14. And it doesn't stop there. Comps for franchised outlets dipped over 2%. Same-store pounds of products bought by franchisees dropped 10%. Let's face it, people are cutting back on Rocky Mountain's confections. I'm sure they're delicious, but it just doesn't matter. Rocky Mountain is going to continue to struggle as we make our way through this macro mess. Management points out that the stock does pay a dividend of $0.10 per quarter. That gives a yield, as of Thursday's closing price, of just about 6%.

That's not bad, and I suppose if you're a long-term value investor who has extremely solid patience, you might want to take a look at Rocky Mountain's shares. I mean, we all know that equities are pretty irrationally priced these days. But, would I step in and buy the stock as any sort of defensive position for my portfolio? No way. I think it's headed lower. And besides, if I wanted to step in and buy something related to confectionery pleasures, I'd probably consider Hershey (NYSE: HSY) first. Not only am I a big fan of the Reese's peanut butter cup, but I perceive the portfolio controlled by Hershey to be a lot more valuable in these troubled times than Rocky Mountain's line of products. Let's hope all the Halloween trick-or-treaters out there are gearing up to help out the confection industry at the end of this month by demanding a whole lot of treats. Goodness knows, the market has already had its share of tricks this year.

Disclosure: I don't own any company mentioned; positions can change at any time.

While big ticket luxury may be a bit of a stretch for many investors right now, small luxuries are still within reach. Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory (NASDAQ: RMCF) stands ready to provide sweet relief from bitter financial news. RMCF manufactures an extensive line of premium chocolates, fudge and other confectionary marvels. It also franchises stores to spread temptation far and wide. The company reported 1Q 2009 record sales of $26.6 million, up 2.4%. Net earnings declined by slightly more. The end results is flat diluted EPS of $0.16.

RMCF continues to expand its franchise model. The company opened 8 new franchise locations in 1Q alone, and plans to open a total of 35-40 new franchise locations in FY2009. Franchise, royalty and marketing fees helped counteract the negative effects of sharp cost increases for chocolate and sugar. The company has no current plans to increase franchise fees given the tough times in the retail sector. Nor will the company provide FY2009 guidance, citing macroeconomic uncertainties. The company did declare its 20th straight quarterly dividend of $0.10. The stock trades right around $9, down 50% from its 52-week high of $18.04. RMCF may be a viable stock for bargain investors. No matter the state of the economy, chocolate is NOT a discretionary purchase for some people. Just make certain that due diligence includes extensive sampling of the entire product line. Expand your portfolio and your waistline at the same time.

Flowers die in a few days. Champagne goes flat, chocolate ends up on her hips, and not all jewelry matches the outfit d'jour. This year, why not give your Biz Babe a gift with a little more permanence; say, stock in a chocolatier, vintner or stone merchant. Here are a few whimsical possibilities:

Say it with chocolate. A pound of Godiva's best Valentine's Day mix will set you back $50 or more. For a few bucks less, you could pick up three shares of the Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory (NASDAQ:RMCF). Since '03, RMCF has grown from around $4 a share to $13.75, and certainly looks better now that those long-digested truffles.

Toast the day with champagne. You could pop open a bottle, but then you'd have to fix the hole in your ceiling and suffer through the hangover. Instead, pick up a share of French company Pernod Ricard (EPA:RI), owners of the Mumm and Perrier-Jouet brands of the bubbly. You'll also own Laphroaig whisky, Seagram's gin, Wild Turkey, and a full bar of other brands. The price is about that of a bottle of Dom Perignon, but the certificate will last longer.

Remember -- not all that glitters is gold. DeBeers would have you believe only a piker would come home without a diamond on Valentine's Day. But how about a diamond stock instead? Give your S.O. a few shares of Tiffany & Co. (NYSE:TIF), for example, and every time she sees another woman wearing a Tiffany creation, your sweetie will get the thrill of knowing a taste of that sale price will end up in her pocket.

Tomorrow: Gift suggestions for the testosteroned one in your life.