I couldn't make this stuff up, and I'm not sure that many people could have or would have. That said, Starbucks (SBUX) announced a recall of its glass water bottles on Thursday.

The glass bottles were not recalled because of some harmful substance that started to seep into the water from the glass, or because the water in the glass bottles was contaminated. No folks, the glass bottles were recalled because (wait for it) the glass bottles could shatter, causing lacerations to the hands.

Here are some highlights from this past week's earnings coverage on BloggingStocks:

• Advanced Micro Devices Inc. (AMD) shares declined despite an earnings beat and a positive outlook
• Bank of America Corp. (BAC) reported that its Q4 loss widened more than expected by Wall Street.
• Capital One Financial Corp. (COF) reported better-than-expected earnings but shares declined.
• Colgate-Palmolive Co. (CL) is seen as on-track to record double-digit earnings growth in 2010.
• Cree Inc. (CREE) strong earnings and revenue growth sent shares to a new 52-week high.

Analyst Upgrades

• FBR Capital upgraded Wells Fargo (WFC) to market perform from underperform and raised its target on shares to $26 from $21 following the company's better-than-expected quarter.
• Deutsche Bank upgraded Starbucks (SBUX) to buy from hold following the company's better-than-expected Q1 results. The firm raised its target price on shares to $30 from $19.
• UBS upgraded Dreamworks (DWA) to buy from neutral, citing upside from its upcoming film releases. The firm raised its target to $50 from $35.
• Colgate (CL) was upgraded to conviction buy from buy at Goldman.
• F5 Networks (FFIV) was upgraded to buy from neutral at BofA/Merrill.
• Applied Industrial (AIT) was upgraded to overweight from equal weight at Stephens.

Upscale coffee retailer Starbucks (SBUX) traded higher after hours Wednesday following a better-than-expected fiscal first quarter earnings report after the market close.

Going into the earnings release, analysts had been expecting to see the Seattle-based coffee retailer show earnings of 28 cents per share, and the company was able to outpace estimates by reporting 32 cents per share. During the same period last year the company had earnings of just 15 cents per share.

It's usually expensive to get a customer. So why not find ways to get more business from your existing base? It's certainly an effective way of building revenues. Hey, just look at the millions of customers that keep returning to businesses like Starbucks (SBUX) and McDondalds (MCD).

So how can you encourage repeat business? It takes hard work and patience. But here are some tips:

Trusted Source: I talked to someone recently who said that she has used the same travel agent for over 30 years. I said, "What about using Expedia or some other online site for your travel?"

One of the easiest stock picks for me to make this year is also one I made last year and for many of the same reasons. In a time of economic turmoil, high unemployment and tight liquidity, what could be more practical than pawn shops and cash advance outlets? EZCORP (EZPW) made me money last year and I expect more of the same as it continues to expand.

Most investors wish they could have gotten in on the ground floor of the hugely successful The Home Depot Corporation (HD), McDonald's Corporation (MCD), or Starbucks Corporation (SBUX) franchises while they only had a few hundred outlets. In the case of EZCORP that is still possible.

It's usually tough finding the right gift for an entrepreneur. Hey, the best thing would probably be a loan or some customers, right?

OK, being realistic, there are some gifts to consider. Let's take a look:

The Cloud: It's all the rage right now -- that is, on-demand software services. The good news is that much of it is affordable. Take a look at Salesforce.com (CRM). The company has a small business edition of its customer relationship management (CRM) offering that comes to only $50 per year.

McDonald's (MCD) was a favorite of mine during the recession, as a weak dollar boosted overseas revenue and value-conscious consumers flocked to the Golden Arches. But low-priced fare can only take you so far, and competitors have started to erode MCD's hold on cheap eats.

What's more, the company's successful McCafe offerings took cash away from Starbucks (SBUX) in early 2009 -- but now cheaper at-home alternatives to brewing coffee are cutting into McDonald's java sales. That's bad news for MCD, and I rate this stock a sell.

Next: Dog of the Dow #11: Procter & Gamble (PG)

Here are some highlights from this past week's earnings coverage on BloggingStocks:

• American Eagle Outfitters Inc. (AEO) Q3 results were so-so, and it declined to offer a Q4 outlook.
• Benihana Inc. (BNHNA) was downgraded following its weaker-than-expected Q2 results.
• Campbell Soup Co. (CPB) reported better-than-expected Q1 earnings revenue fell short of estimates.
• Deere & Co. (DE) Q4 earnings easily topped low expectations and its cash flow is strong.
• Dollar Tree Inc. (DLTR) strong Q3 numbers topped the Street view and it offered Q4 and full-year guidance.
• Eastman Chemical Co. (EMN) earnings prospects led one analyst to upgrade the stock.

Today started out strong and stayed positive all day, even if some commented that the highs were not held. The weak dollar helped commodities and helped stocks. A 10.1% October sales rise by the National Association of Realtors by those trying to get the home buyer tax credit didn't hurt either. Ditto for a reiteration that the recession is over.

Here were today's unofficial closing bell levels:

Dow 10,450.04 +131.88 (1.28%)
S&P 500 1,106.13 +14.75 (1.35%)
Nasdaq 2,175.96 +29.92 (1.39%)

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Analyst upgrades:

• Jefferies upgraded Starbucks (SBUX) to buy from hold, citing EPS and revenue momentum heading into 2010. The firm raised its target to $25 from $22.
• Soleil upgraded Zions Bancorp (ZION) to buy from hold on valuation as it believes the recent pullback provides an attractive entry point. The firm has a $17.50 price target on shares.
• RBC Capital expects Rigel Pharmaceuticals (RIGL) to sign a partnership for R788 in the next four months to run its global Phase III program. Shares were upgraded to outperform from sector perform and its target was raised to $11 from $9.
• Deere (DE) was upgraded to overweight from equal weight at Morgan Stanley.
• Shire (SHPGY) was raised to outperform from market perform at Bernstein.
• Ann Taylor (ANN) was upgraded to overweight from market weight at Thomas Weisel.
• J.M. Smucker (SJM) was upgraded to overweight from neutral at JPMorgan.

I have had my problem with Starbucks (SBUX) CEO Howard "Schultzie" Schultz in the past, but his latest little stunt has really ticked me off.

First things first, I will enjoy the occasional cup of Starbucks coffee, but the price has put a venti mocha-frappa-latte-chino out of my budget so I have started making my own at home. The company's product is good, but its competitors -- namely McDonald's (MCD) and Dunkin' Donuts -- offer a comparable product at a fraction of the price. I have long thought that Starbucks' saturation business model has been its biggest fault, with Schultzie's leadership running a close second.

Imagine taking the personal connections and interactions that occur every day on the likes of Facebook and Twitter... and bringing them to bear on an education. To a large extent, this hasn't been done yet, but the potential is profound. In a new report by the Center for Community Survey for Student Engagement, two-year programs aren't taking advantage of the tools at their disposal -- plenty of growth is still possible. Kay McClenney, director of the CCSSE, says, "Colleges are not taking advantage of that particular set of tools for making connections with students to the extent that they could."

We have seen what exports can do for fast food restaurants. Can the same happen with coffee stocks?

In some ways, it is already happening. Starbucks (SBUX) has made a big push overseas and many of its stores can be found in foreign markets. And a weak dollar is going to accelerate the trend greatly.

Last week, under the guise of betting on America, Warren Buffett and his Berkshire Hathaway (BRK.A) made an offer to buy all outstanding shares of Burlington Northern (BNI) for a significant premium.

In making the announcement, Buffett confidently claimed that rail would play a big role in the recovery of the economy. What he did not say was that this was a bet on the U.S. dollar.