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Andrew Lahde shuts down hedge fund after 1,000% returns: What'd he have to say?

A little less than a year ago I wrote about Andrew Lahde, a California-based hedge fund manager who earned his investors 1,000% on their money with huge bets on the collapse of subprime.

Now he's closing up shop, and the missive he sent his investors is quite possibly the most brilliant piece of writing since Don Quixote. You can read the whole thing here, including Lahde's thoughts on aristocracy, meritocracy, marijuana legalization, Paxil, alternative energy and BlackBerries. Here are some of my favorite quotes:

"I was in this game for the money. The low hanging fruit, i.e. idiots whose parents paid for prep school, Yale, and then the Harvard MBA, was there for the taking. These people who were (often) truly not worthy of the education they received (or supposedly received) rose to the top of companies such as AIG, Bear Stearns and Lehman Brothers and all levels of our government. All of this behavior supporting the Aristocracy, only ended up making it easier for me to find people stupid enough to take the other side of my trades. God bless America."

Lahde also opined: "At a time when rhetoric is flying about becoming more self-sufficient in terms of energy, why is it illegal to grow this plant in this country? Ah, the female. The evil female plant -- marijuana. It gets you high, it makes you laugh, it does not produce a hangover. Unlike alcohol, it does not result in bar fights or wife beating. So, why is this innocuous plant illegal? Is it a gateway drug? No, that would be alcohol, which is so heavily advertised in this country. My only conclusion as to why it is illegal, is that Corporate America, which owns Congress, would rather sell you Paxil, Zoloft, Xanax and other additive drugs, than allow you to grow a plant in your home without some of the profits going into their coffers."

Forward Lahde's letter to everyone you know -- it's a classic of hedge fund literature, right up there with Dan Loeb's "Get thee to the Hamptons" screed aimed at a CEO who wasn't making him rich enough fast enough.

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Last updated: May 28, 2012: 01:58 AM

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