I've had a few mortgages in my time, and they've always been the 30-year fixed rate type. You couldn't get me to take an adjustable rate mortgage at gun point, but that's not the point of this post. What I have to say will come to most of you as an oversimplification in the face of the mortgage banking meltdown, but try as I may, I just can't make it any more complicated than this. If I was a mortgage banker facing the wholesale destruction of my lending sector, I'd suck it up quick and proceed as follows:

I would begin to contact all my mortgage clients with notes facing foreclosure, starting with the most serious cases first. I'd make the offer for fixed rate refinancing at current rates with a 2% point fee attached to the note. The 2% could be paid up front, financed with the principle, tagged to the end of the mortgage as an appendage to be paid upon sale of the property, or handled as a separate note. I would, of course, need the blessings of the secondary mortgage market, but when it's a case of bailing water as you're sinking or properly fixing the holes, you only have two choices: You can work together for an effective solution or you can simply look really stupid.

All I'm hearing is a bunch of boo hoo hoo, the mortgages are rotten, what shall we do! I've yet to see just one three-piece suit come forward with a constructive idea. I'm not hearing anything ... are you? If it's really as scary as the 100k a year crowd is claiming it to be, then where are all those wrinkled old farts with their masterful solutions? Perhaps if a couple of those crisp paper misers would slip out of their leather-clad offices for just a moment and network with people who are in fear of losing their homes, we could come up with some compromises and creative solutions that would equally benefit the consumers, the banks, and the economy.

Until and unless I see someone step out from behind the falsely erected shroud of "there's nothing we can do," I have no pity for the mortgage holders, and my position is underpinned with a healthy "shame on you." You did this to yourselves with shoddy lending practices, dubious documentation, and your profiteering, fee-laden attitudes. Now get your asses out of those leather desk chairs and fix the mess you created. It's yours, you made it, now pick up after yourselves. It's the least you can do.