"SEXY." The capital letters blared at me from the window of Victoria's Secret in Pioneer Place here in Portland. Next to the clean lovely windows of the Apple store, I felt I almost had to shield my eyes, to protect me from the glare. The mannequin dressed in a red bustier seemed more Elvira than Rebecca Romijn, the sweet face of Victoria's Secret when I was a loyal customer in my early 20s.

I'm not the only one turned off by the company's recent focus on sexy above all else. In rather shocking statements during this morning's Limited Brands Inc. (NYSE: LTD) analyst call, Victoria's Secret CEO Sharen Turney said the company has "gotten too much off our heritage" and was "too sexy," no longer the ideal "ultra-feminine."

With black lacquer and shocking pink decor, the "s" word thrown around like neon signs in a red-light district, and rather unsubtle displays, this isn't my mother's Victoria's Secret.

Mega-trendy retailer Limited Brands (NYSE: LTD) announced the sale today of its Express Stores unit to private equity firm Golden Gate Capital, and in the same breath said it was evaluating the options for its Limited Stores segment -- the brand the company derives its name from. Despite the surface inscrutability of this decision (why sell the company's titular brands, the ones that are growing in gross profit while the company's other units are slipping bigtime?), it's one that analysts have been predicting for a while given that CEO Leslie Wexner has been hyping his Victoria's Secret unit as a "megabrand" upon which Limited's future prospects would hinge. Both Victoria's Secret and soap-and-lotion retailer Bath & Body Works, he insists, depend on products whose sales are more predictable than those of clothing.

While that's certainly true, it's also true that the profit margins for the cheap, trendy clothing sold by the company's Express and Limited stores are growing while the rest of the company's brands are falling. Today the company announced that it is revising its outlook for Q1 2007 downward significantly due to poorer-than-expected sales and merchandise margins at Victoria's Secret. After slashing the outlook from 25-28 cents a share to 12-14 cents a share, the stock was down significantly, $1.23 or 4.5% to $26.18, although after-market trading shows some nice recovery.

Perhaps the prediction isn't so easy, but the fact remains that the profit margins and same-store sales growth is a lot better on lemongrass- and magnolia-scented lotion than tank tops and skinny jeans. While Victoria's Secret and Bath & Body Works regularly record operating profit in the 20-30% range, a good quarter for Express and Limited stores hovers between 5% and 6%. Lingerie is sexy, and soap is way, way sexier -- and Limited Brands has picked this clean, sweet-smelling horse to ride for now.

As of February 3, 2007, Limited had 658 Express stores and 260 Limited stores; 1,326 stores in the Victoria's Secret unit (which includes the La Senza brand); and 1,546 Bath & Body Works stores.

In an area where good coffee is ubiquitous, how does one business stand apart from another? A diverse selection of low-fat bran muffins? Not for me. Free Norah Jones CD samplers? Nope. Sheer, baby-doll negligees with thigh-high boots? Sold.

According to The Seattle Times, along the cluttered roadsides of Seattle's commuter towns, drive-through espresso bars are going to creative lengths to attract business, well, male business at least. These caffeinated joints feature "bodacious" baristas offering not just double macchiatos with almond biscotti, but "flirty service and revealing outfits" (including lingerie and "fetish" ensembles) at establishments with names such as Moka Girls, Bikini Espresso and Natté Latté.

While drive-throughs have long been part of Starbucks Corp (NASDAQ:SBUX)'s business, many independent espresso stands popped up after the state's smoking ban went into effect a year ago. Says Lori Bowden, owner of Tukwila, Washington's Cowgirls Espresso stand, owners of bars, casinos and convenience-stores at that time began renting parking lot spots to espresso stands. And while the debate rages over who started the whole Red Light District element, no one argues that the Git-R-Done nation -- who might never have entered a Starbucks -- are now frequenting their establishments many times a day.

Offended local businesses have set up surveillance but no laws have been broken, as private parts -- including buttocks -- are always covered. Says Bowden, in spite of customer requests "there will be no 'Thong Thursdays.'"

B. Brandon Barker is the author of Operation EMU

Julie Roehm contradicted everything that Sam Walton ever held dear, and her hiring a year ago had many Wal-Mart Stores, Inc. (NYSE:WMT) observers scratching their heads. Famous for her racy, attention-getting antics -- like her "Lingerie Bowl" in which models clad in underthings played 'football' -- Roehm never seemed the right sort for Wal-Mart. She was fast cars, sex and rock-and-roll to Wal-Mart's Buicks, family values and Barry Manilow. In fact, her transformation of the shareholder meeting from boring to off-Broadway was a spectacle to behold (and, it seems, had old-line Wal-Mart executives "groaning," according to the New York Times.

[Recent Julie Roehm news:
Wal-Mart should bring Julie Roehm back -- May 27, 2007
Julie Roehm claims Lee Scott violated ethics -- May 25, 2007
Julie Roehm says Wal-Mart charges invalid -- March 29, 2007
Wal-Mart countersues Julie Roehm -- March 20, 2007]

Now she's been ousted, amid allegations of an inappropriate relationship with a subordinate, and the advertising agency she chose -- DraftFCB of Chicago -- is unceremoniously dismissed before it even began work on the huge account.

How was this ever supposed to work? I have to ask. Wal-Mart executives, even Sam himself, were always told to sleep two to a room while travelling on business, and select the cheapest available lodging. The company has strict "fraternization" rules so that any relationship between colleagues is inappropriate. [While it's not said outright in anything I've read, it seems that Julie Roehm has been read-between-the-lines accused of sleeping with Sean Womack, a member of the marketing staff at a lower rank than Roehm. It doesn't shock me. People who work together sleep together, it's happened everywhere I've ever collected a paycheck.]

Wal-Mart is so not Julie Roehm.

The headline everywhere 'round the blogosphere today: "beef is sexy." McDonald's Corporation (NYSE:MCD) is making waves not only with its slap-the-forehead realization that its customers want to eat breakfast food after 10:30 a.m., but also with its ad campaign in China.

Evidently, these ads, they show how sexy McDonald's hamburgers are.

Even though the "Where's the beef?" ad campaign from the 80s was decidedly un-sexy, I think I can speak for all of America when I say: MCD, you are not the first one ever to make the connection between beef and sex. Isn't beef tenderloin the most oft-ordered entree on Valentine's Day? And correct me if I'm wrong, but haven't certain members of the male population equated their, um, male member with this favorite of all red meats?

McDonald's is, it seems, discovering the obvious. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I'd say that any management team deserves adulation for giving the people what they want.

Especially when it's sex.